23. února 2021 v 17:51
Sam
In the meantime, cleanse your spirit as much as you can. Meditate, do yoga regularly, take up a new hobby (I know you said you already have some), take a fun class at a local community college, go on a trip–even if it’s just an hour away. You have to get through this. You can get through this.
Thanks for reading and sharing your story.
Hug,
Kaneisha
Kaneisha´s last blog ..Is Wendy Williams Right About Marriage?
REPLY
J.G. Boccella May 10, 2010 at 11:06 pm
Kaneisha -
Good for you for knowing your worth! You are right to believe that there are men out there who are ready to celebrate you and recognize how fabulous, beautiful and powerful you are — and who can “stay there in loving attention.” I know because I married an incredible woman who refused to settle and we now have a precious 3-yr-old daughter. Rock on!
PEACE&BLESSINGS,
23. února 2021 v 17:51
Sam
REPLY
Kaneisha May 8, 2010 at 11:38 am
Hi V,
Thank you so much for sharing your story. Unfortunately, your story is one I’ve seen plenty of times and still see all the time. I was your story on a mini scale (think 11 months instead of 3.5 years).
You didn’t waste 3.5 years of your life. You proved to yourself that you are capable of moving to a completely new city, getting a job, making friends, and establishing a life! That’s a really big deal! You aren’t stupid, so there was obviously some love and goodness there during the 3.5 years you two were together.
You sound pretty fabulous to me! I know it doesn’t feel like it right now. You feel like he took all the beauty, love, and goodness you had to give when he walked out of your life. I promise that he didn’t. What happened is that you wrapped so much of your happiness and self-worth up in him and the relationship, when he left, you felt like you were left with nothing.
This is not forever. This is not every man. This is not every relationship you will have.
What to do now? Warning: My advice is drastic, but drastic situations call for drastic situations.
Get out of that city. As soon as you can. You only moved there to be there with Mr. Never Ready, you did not say that you love your job (only that you have one), and everything about that city screams his name to you. I know you’re working on your MBA, so that likely means you have to stay to at least finish that (don’t let him mess with your education!). But then you get out of there as soon as you can. Move back in with your mother (I don’t care if you’re 40), go to where your best girl friend is, close your eyes and point to a map (of course one that has all the sad, cold cities crossed out). I don’t care how much furniture you have, how much money you don’t have, or how settled you’ve become in the city you live in. You get out of Dodge as soon as you can–and never loo
